Blues Brothers 2000

Rated: PG-13
Runtime: 2 Hours and 3 Minutes

Reviewer: Dale
Grade: F

Every so often a movie is made that is so bad that you want to cry. Not only because the movie has driven you to it, but because the movie in question was such a wasted opportunity. It was a waste of time, a waste of talent, a waste of FILM.

Such is Blues Brothers 2000.

The film is very routine, so much so that it is pedestrian. It is one of those awful sequels that just takes the plot of the first movie and rehashes it. If you have seen the first film, then you know the plot of this one. Except that this one involves white supremacists, the Russian mafia, and an orphaned kid who wants to be a member of the band. Unlike "The Phantom Menace", the kid in this movie is actually pretty good... with what he was given to work with. No, there are a plethora of problems facing this movie.

First of all, and most damaging, the film is not funny. The original Blues Brothers succeeded because it had a gigantic level of energy, it was bold and daring, and it was downright hilarious at every turn. I cannot recall a single joke from this movie that worked. In fact, I cannot recall a single joke from this movie. Period. The first one was excessive, but it did not rely on this excess for every, single joke. The jokes in the original Blues Brothers were outrageous, yes, (who can forget the Nazi's Volkswagen which plummets from a height greater than The Sears Tower? Certainly not I) but they were also quite clever. The original was bold in its use of flashy elements: musical numbers, lots of villains ("I hate Illinois Nazis!) and huge numbers of cars (mostly cop cars) crashing and crashing and crashing. This one tries hard, too hard, but the joke is no longer funny, It crashes more cars, but somehow it's heart just isn't in it. It has some wonderfully done musical numbers, but we'd be better off buying the CD. It has good songs, but no idea what to do with them. I would actually give the soundtrack a B+, but the movie it cannot save the movie it is attached to. There is no real structure, there is no edge, there is no heart here. The movie is a soulless exercise on which to hang some really good songs and is actually more plotless than most music videos. By the time the Blues Brothers were transformed into zombies (it doesn't make any more sense if you actually SEE the movie) you are left scratching your head and wondering what went wrong.

This is one of those sequels that is so bad that it makes you think less of the original. If you haven't befouled your eyes with it, my advice is the advice of a smoker dying of lung cancer to a non-smoker: Just don't start!